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Thoughts in the studio… » 2007 » March

March 2007



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How's my blogging?


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An interesting conundrum.

Kellz is speaking about the self-perpetuating reaction of talking to models. From one bottle and one bottle, the addition of more bottles means more models. Note that the quantity of models gained is unspecified, but implies a positive feedback loop: by the fourth bottle, we may have dozens of models.

However, if you start with no bottles and no models, the popping of a first bottle might not bring the first model! That first model’s presence is a prerequisite for catalyzing the appearance of more models. Models are thus autocatalytic, but as noted above several bottles can accumulate in the complete absence of models.

Assuming we do have at least one model and one bottle, the apparent exponential growth would cause astronomical numbers of models if no force acted to restrain this growth. To wit:

One bottle = one model
n + 1 bottles = F(n) + 1 models.
Going with the assumption above that models increase as the square of bottles:
F(n) models = n^2 bottles^2 * Kelly
Where Kelly is a constant pimp game correction factor, with units of models per squared bottles. Let R Kelly’s pimp game = 1, so we can ignore this correction factor for now.
n = 0, we have one bottle and one model.
n = 1, we have two bottles and two models.
n = 2, we have three bottles and four models.
n = 3, we have four bottles and nine models.
n = 4, we have five bottles and 16 models.

Assuming an average bottle service price of $400 per bottle, we’ve spent $1,600 to get 16 models. What if we mortgage our house to buy bottles? The median home sale price in the USA in 2004 was $185k, which gives us enough scratch for 462 bottles.
n = 462, we have 463 bottles and 213,444 models.

The population of orlando, florida is 199,336 people.

Thus I have scientifically proven that if you sell your house to pop bottles, the entire city of orlando, florida will have sex with you.

The current forecast for orlando is overcast with a 90% chance of SKEET SKEET SKEET SKEET (weatherman bout to make it rain)


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Mingus Plays Piano

I picked this record up years ago at Kim’s video. It’s pretty much just 11 cuts of Mingus screwing around on the piano. It’s fucking genius. I listen to this record sometimes and actually question weither I even have any business fucking with this music thing. It’s that good.

I mean, the guy is a fucking bass player for fucks sake. Most people I play the album for are like, “Wait, But doesn’t Mingus plays bass??!? HOLY SHIT!!!”

This is one of those jazz records you HAVE TO OWN. Yeah sure, keep a copy of “Kind of Blue” around so you can look bourgie and impress suburban chicks and shit but if you wanna a serious EXPERIENCE, turn out all the lights in your apartment and listen to this record.

It actually feels like bol is sitting in the room with you playing the piano.

Charles Mingus, “Myself when I am real”

The album on Amazon


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Marilyn Manson’s autobiography. I just read this yesterday and highly recommend it. It’s the first time in awhile I literally sat down and read a book cover to cover in almost one sitting.

He’s definitely one of those artists that I categorize as, “Well, I’m not really a huge fan of your music but now that I understand your concepts and remarkable insight. Props. You do you.”

So yeah, read it The long road out of hell by Marilyn Manson


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I’m done with the drum n’ bass thing. It’s not that I don’t love it, I’m just not in love with it anymore. Too many idiot fanboys and myopic scenesters, WAYYY not enough innovation and experimentation. Try not to let the door hit you on the way out, kthanksbye.

From now on this just gonna be me ranting about music and life in general. Enjoy.